Monday, August 21, 2006

Where Did The Time Go?

This morning was a momentous occassion in the Madden house...Garrett started kindergarten today. He really was excited about going to school again. He wanted to see his friends from last year in pre-k and he wanted to go to recess and yes, for now, he is even excited about learning new things. I woke him up, fed him breakfast(yogurt and granola bar along with his coffee milk) and got him dressed. The whole time he was smiling and eager and raring to go. I did pretty well too...on the outside. I smiled and answered his questions and pumped him up about his new
teacher Mrs. Underwood (I've heard that she is a wonderful teacher...strict but loving) which I think will be WONDERFUL for Garrett as sometimes he needs to be reminded that he is NOT the one in charge all the time. But inside I was a
little bit sad. He looked so big and grown up in his
school uniform. Where has five and half years gone? It seems like yesterday Ryan was handing this tiny little bundle to me and I looked into these wide staring eyes and fell in love instantly. I remember being taken aback that he looked at me so intently and for so long. I didn't know that newborns could look so inquisitive or convey such emotions with their eyes. He stared and stared and we had a little conversation between the two of us. He seemed to be saying, "Well, here I am, Momma." and I said, "Yes, my beautiful boy, here you are. I don't know, my son, if I'm quite ready for this journey. I thought I was but now...looking at how tiny and helpless you are, I don't know if I can do this." His little eyes were steady and they measured me up and slowly, slowly, slowly they closed and I felt him say, "Oh yes, you can do it. I trust you to take care of me. I feel safe and warm and loved and I know you'll do fine, Momma. God brought you and me together and he knew we needed each other." Oh how it seems like that moment just happened yesterday and here he is waving goodbye to me so excitedly as he left for school with his Daddy. I know he went to pre-k last year and it shouldn't be such a big deal to me but it is. In Pre-K it wasn't real. I could keep him home with me anytime I wanted and no one would say a word. Kindergarten is for real and he has taken another step on this journey towards independence. Please, God, guard my boy today and everyday. Help him to always have a happy heart, a willingness and hunger to learn new things, and a friendly and outgoing spirit so as to comfort those who need it. Thank you, Lord, for the precious gift you gave us when Garrett was born. We will do our best to raise him into the young man you want him to be.
Garrett, I hope your first day has been wonderful....can't wait to hear all about it when I pick you up. Only two more hours for this anxious Momma to wait.